Quickies

At weddings old aunts usd to tease me saying "You are next, you are next."
But they stoppd it since I started doin the same to them at funerals...!!

What if you're in hell, and you're mad at someone, where do you tell them to go?

Eve to Adam: Do you love me?
Adam nonchalantly: Who else?

I'm an athiest, Thanks God.

I was an atheist untill i realized I am god..

There's one thing i like about babies..
making them!!

a man when asked "Do you talk to your wife after sex?" answered "Depends, if I can find a phone"

If you jogged backward . . .would you gain weight?

wife - u were so drunk last night that u insulted ur boss
husband - piss him
wife - u did that and he fired u
husband - fuck him
wife - i did that! and you can go to work from tomorrow

what does mallika sherawat do first thing in the morning?
she goes home.